Don't Force Or Manage It, I Learned The Hard Way

As she touched my face I felt my juices flowing.

It was overwhelming and as I felt my creative juice flow, I knew I would write about this experience.

"I would hold her so she is still while you work on her eyes" I heard her say to the other person working on my face.

As they worked I recalled the saying 'too many cooks spoil the broth', I just hoped that the broth here - my face - wouldn't be spoilt.
My make up was being done by two people who I was told were 'makeup artists' - ever heard of two makeup artists working on one face simultaneously?

I sat still hoping and trusting that this would turn out fine, deciding that the worst that can happen is for the session to be a disaster a la my face looking 'unfine'. I would simply wash it all off and opt out of the photo shoot.

So here's what resulted in two makeup artists doing my makeup.
A group I work with reached out to say there would be a 'Photo Shoot' to promote our work. We would be dressed uniformly and were to bring three outfits - this set off alarm bells in my head as I hate uniforms. I had not been at the meeting where all this was decided as I had traveled for work so I was stuck with their choice.
I got the memo a day before the shoot so when I got home from work, I spent the night picking my outfits.

On the morning of the event, I arrived at the time stated but no one was there so I went back to work. Hours later I was told the others had arrived and their makeup had even been done so I dressed up and left work again.
When I got there I complimented those whose makeup had been done and sat still as I watched the two makeup artists that were contracted work, I would be the last.
When it got to my turn, they both said they were done as they had other events to go for blah blah blah.

I was embarrassed, livid and irritated.

The person who had been put in charge and who contracted them spoke to them and as I watched I thought about my time that had been wasted and I felt anger sipping through me - I slowly tapped the handle of the chair I sat on, shook my legs, clenched my fist, inhaled and exhaled just to keep calm.
She tried to pacify me but I got up to tell my boss, the head of the group of the development and then I walked out.
The person who had sent out the memo about the shoot called to say an arrangement had been made for two members of the group who are 'makeup artists' to do my makeup. I thought if they were makeup artists why did they not do everyone else's makeup?
So I simply told her that I was planning a shoot of my own and wasn't interested anymore but the head of the group called and I knew I couldn't say no even though somehow I felt things wouldn't turn out right - I hated the position I was in.

That's how I found myself being made up by two makeup artists.
As they worked, people around kept ohing and ahing but I kept still, thinking, trusting that it was really 'nice'.

As soon as they finished, I was hurried into the studio for the shoot in my first outfit as everyone else was done and were waiting for me to join in the second session - so I didn't get a chance to look in the mirror. The photographer said something about us getting married as I looked too good and I thought okay maybe it's not bad. I even joked that he should get a Priest and rings, imagine!
After the session in my first outfit, I hurried to join the others and kept getting compliments of how I looked 'really nice'. I couldn't say thank you as I was yet to see my face so I just nodded, then I picked up a mirror to appreciate the work done on my face, it was unbelievable!

I looked like I was about to audition for the role of a circus clown, calling it horrendous would be doing justice to how I looked.

I felt tears welling up in my eyes as it dawned on me that I was surrounded by my 'enemies', I mean anyone who complimented the hideous makeup on my face has to be my enemy.
I called one of the 'makeup artistes' aside and showed her pictures on my phone, pictures of makeup I did myself and she went on to talk about how I should stop complaining as that would only make it worse.
I looked at her beautifully made up face and asked if she would say the same thing if she were in my shoes.
I just picked up my bag and left - the group, the obviously blind photographer who was busy calling me his wife, the photosession, everything.

I went back to work and spent about 30 minutes wiping the makeup from my face. I couldn't really do any work as I had spent my productive time 'preparing for a photo shoot'.

As I sat down on my desk, feeling sorry for myself - yes it's that serious for me, I thought about the time i soent picking my outfits and ironing them when I should be sleeping and reminded myself again that I had an inkling that this shoot thing wouldn't go well for me - or maybe it was the negative vibe I sent out that the universe responded to.

Anyway, I learned an already learned lesson AGAIN: if it doesn't feel right, do not manage it or go with people's opinion.
If it doesn't feel right, then maybe it isn't right and shouldn't be forced or managed.

I learned this the hard way.